Beyond the ‘It Girl’ Game: Living Richly Offline

Every so often, I’ll post on Instagram—mostly to let you know I’m still here. And yes, I’m working on being more "present" online. But honestly, I’d rather live my life fully than live it just to post about it. Somewhere along the way, we started equating visibility with vitality—if you’re not posting, you must not be living. But I’ve found the opposite to be true.

At my core, I’m deeply spiritual. My relationship with God shapes how I move, how I connect, and how I see the world. That foundation keeps me grounded, reminding me to prioritize depth over performance, presence over appearances. Don’t get me wrong—I love beauty, aesthetics, and capturing special moments. And I absolutely believe social media can be inspiring. Seeing someone book a solo trip, start a business, or embrace their best self can be a push in the right direction. But I also know that not everything we see is as effortless or fulfilling as it appears.

Social media wasn’t just created for connection; it was designed to keep us engaged, scrolling, and consuming. Those dopamine hits from likes and views feel good in the moment, but they can also leave us feeling empty—especially when we start measuring our worth by how much attention we receive. I’ve seen the good social media has done—helping people build careers, foster community, and share important messages. But I’ve also seen how easy it is to get caught up in the illusion, mistaking curated content for real fulfillment. And that’s where I pause and ask: Are we truly living, or are we just creating content about life? Where is the soul? Are we all reading from the same script?

Here’s where it gets paradoxical for me. I live a life that many dream about—a life others might document and showcase online. Friends often ask, “Why don’t you post more? You’re actually living it!” And while I understand that perspective, my answer is simple: My life is for me first. I’ve worked hard to build a life that brings me joy, growth, and privilege—but those blessings don’t define me. What defines me is my faith, my character, and how I show up in the world—not just online, but in real life.

That’s not to say I won’t share at all. I love celebrating moments, capturing beauty, and sharing insights that might resonate with someone else. But I’ve realized that my most meaningful experiences don’t always need an audience. Some things are sacred. Some moments are best enjoyed in the presence of people who truly know and love you, not just through a screen.

I’ve also learned that real connection isn’t built on perfectly curated posts. It’s built on presence, shared experiences, and deep conversations. Maybe that’s why I’ve pulled back from the constant need to document everything. When I tell a friend about the spices I brought back from Spain or the soulful experience of visiting South Africa, it’s not for likes—it’s for the joy of reliving those moments with someone who genuinely cares.

That said, I know social media is here to stay, and I’m not against it. I’m just for using it intentionally. I love what it’s done for business, for storytelling, and for amplifying voices. And yes, I’m working on sharing more, especially as I continue to refine and grow my brand. But for me, it’s not about playing the “It Girl” game. It’s about making sure that what I share feels true to me and aligned with my purpose.

If you’ve ever felt disconnected from the noise or pressured to keep up, I hope this resonates. It’s okay to want more than the highlight reel. It’s okay to choose substance over spectacle. Because at the end of the day, the richest life isn’t the one that looks good—it’s the one that feels good.

I’d love to hear from you—what’s your relationship with social media? Do you ever feel the pressure to perform? Let’s talk.

All my love, AB