Fighting the Negative Thoughts: A Guide to Reclaiming Your Inner Joy

Most people struggle with negative thoughts from time to time, and the impact of these can play havoc with your mental well-being. The unwelcome, insidious, persistent, self-critical thoughts easily creep into your life, ruining your self-esteem and sucking your joy. Matters worsen as you spiral down into a self-fulfilling cycle of negativity.

We cannot just be okay with continually being so hard on ourselves! Reclaim your happiness by challenging your mindset. There is a tried-and-true way to feel better about your situation and improve what your future could look like: you combat negative thoughts by embracing positivity. Make it a non-negotiable to strive for a space of positivity and it will change how you see your world. Challenge your thoughts, challenge your perceptions, change your language, change your environment. And increase your joy.

Understanding Negative Thoughts

Negative thoughts are fixed, unfavorable beliefs that can take a toll on your mental health. They are irrational beliefs about oneself, others, and the world that provoke feelings of self-doubt, uncertainty, and not being "good enough." This false narrative generates a distorted view of reality that adds to your pain and suffering. Long-term negative thoughts produce symptoms of depression and anxiety that affect your ability to feel "happy," exacerbating a person's sense of doom and gloom.

The cycle of negative thoughts and feelings can make a person feel rotten inside and maintain the will to live a normal lifestyle. These symptoms of mental health can affect a person's ability to socialize, be around loved ones, or perform daily job-related tasks or academic studies. It’s a cycle that needs to be broken in order to feel like yourself again to bring back happiness.

Move Your Body

Exercise can drastically affect your mental health for one key reason: physical activity releases endorphins, or “feel-good” hormones. This is why exercise has the ability to reduce stress, anxiety, and feelings of depression, delivering a general sense of well-being and enhancing your mood overall. It can also be a nice distraction from those spiraling negative thoughts.

There’s more. In fact, exercise can also impact self-esteem. Its neurobiological benefits play a role in cognitive functioning, narrowing this section’s topic a little, but because it’s a “why exercise is good for you” post, it’s also important to note.

But bear in mind. You don’t need to hit the ground running with your exercise routine. Make it feel doable for you. For some people, that could mean anticipating going for a run twice a week. For others, it could mean choosing to take the stairs instead of the elevator when you have a choice or walking on a nearby trail (remember how good sunlight is for you) during your lunch break.

Volunteer Your Time

Assisting others can dramatically increase self-esteem and expand globally. Performing kind deeds will create a feeling of productivity and purpose, which can translate to increased self-worth. When people receive the direct results of their kind deeds, they will think more positively of their ability, jumpstarting a cycle of confident energy.

Community service serves as the best outlet to achieve these accomplishments and community knowledge. Serving food at a local homeless shelter, contributing to food drives, or participating as a "Big Brother" or "Big Sister" are great initiatives. These extracurricular duties will generate a better view of those who regularly participate (and hopefully generate a few smiles). They will also spark a broader understanding of people around the world.

Embrace Meditation

Meditation lessens stress and anxiety, creates a sense of calm, helps with concentration, and generally promotes an overall sense of well-being. It is the art of being mindful. This is your weapon for combating every level of life stress that comes your way. You are creating an avenue for mental stability. You're giving your mind the ability to cross all those rugged terrains and come out on the other side focused, unscathed, and ready to stare down any other dragon coming your way. This basic tool can also lead to better sleep and increased self-awareness.

If you're planning on beginning your meditation practice, we recommend finding a nice, quiet place to meditate where it's only you; unplugging for a bit. Start small with a minute or two per day, then work your way into five or ten minutes; whatever length you're comfortable with. You can incorporate deep breaths or a mantra to familiarize yourself with the art of meditation. An echo dot or similar voice-activated device can provide guided meditation, leading you to connect your mind through the echo dot mediation feature. This is part of this important routine for every day. Relaxing your mind just might be the key to more overall productivity.

Smile More

Smiling can positively affect our mood or mental state. The simple creasing of one's face can bring about an influx of dopamine and serotonin––which are neurotransmitters that contribute to feelings of happiness––and lessen stress. This technique applies to traditional feedback loop logic: the happier we are, the more we smile. The more we smile, the happier we become or stay. See the list below for ways one can add more smiles to their day.

Start the morning with a smile––stand in front of the mirror and get your brain going, with an endorphin-filled beginning to your day. Gain closer connections with individuals or those around you by smiling more during the conversation, which can boost both your mood and the mood of the person you're conversing with. Watch or read something that will make you smile or laugh—humor is a great way to ensure you're getting your daily dose of happiness, amongst other daily activities that may bring about stress or frustration.

Fill Your Ears with Positivity

Music has such a significant effect on our moods and emotions, making it a crucial tool for maintaining our mental health. There are many studies that have proven that music causes your brain to release dopamine — this neurotransmitter is known to make you feel happy and satisfied, decreasing anxiety and depression. Depending on the music you are listening to, producing different responses can help create/regulate the mood you want to be in.

Having a playlist on hand for whenever you're feeling [insert negative emotion, i.e. sad, depressed, anxious, angry, inferior, lonely — the list goes on] can be a great way to help you through it. Chances are, if you make it right now, you're in a good state of mind. Use that as an opportunity to choose songs to help your future self feel better. Gather all the songs that make you feel uplifted, motivated, and nostalgic.

Keep a Happiness Journal

A happiness journal is just that—a journal where you document the good things in life. Doing so makes you more aware of the good and fosters a spirit of positivity and contentment. Think of it as your personal happiness project: the aim is to make you just a bit happier and to teach you how to be happy in life.

To set up a happiness journal, all you need is—you guessed it—an empty journal. And something to write with. Once a day, write down three things that made you happy. Write it in the form of a traditional prose diary or a minimalist, bullet form if you wish. Mix other journaling methods into this if you want. Use this to learn from your happy moments or as a reverse burn book. This is your personal happiness log.

From here, you’ll literally be counting your blessings. With this recomposed focus on the good, your outlook will eventually shift for the better. This is just one of many methods I use to maintain my own happiness levels.

Surround Yourself with Positive Influences

Our social circles heavily influence our state of mind, mental health, and overall happiness. Having someone to talk to can reduce feelings of loneliness and provide a source of emotional support. On the other hand, toxic relationships can cause us to feel stressed out or anxious, making it necessary to form positive relationships and limit the toxic ones.

Join a club or participate in community activities. Attend workshops, join group sports, or volunteer for organizations that you are personally interested in. Use these opportunities to find friends and positive influences to add to your life. If you have the chance, do the same online — many online communities can be warm, welcoming, and supportive of others. For some, if they feel out of place or ostracized within their physical communities, they may be able to find a place online within a digital community that serves as a safe haven. Life is too short to waste time on toxic people; find good friends who encourage personal growth, resilience, and happiness.

Reframe Your Thoughts

Cognitive reframing is a technique used in psychological therapy where you change the way you look at a situation, thereby changing the way it emotionally affects you. It’s achieved by identifying negative thought patterns and questioning their validity. With this, you slowly shift the direction of your thoughts more towards the positive end of the spectrum. The technique has you stop at a negative thought and pose questions to challenge it like, "What evidence is there that my thought is true?" or "Is there a better, or more positive, way of looking at this?" (I.e., "I’m terrible at public speaking" versus, "I’m getting in practice for public speaking.") The subtle shift should not only decrease stress and stress-related symptoms, but it may also increase your resiliency and promote a more optimistic outlook on your challenges.

Own Your Journey

Personal responsibility is huge for mental health because taking responsibility is what allows us to take that power and change our thinking and behavior around it. Understanding that we are responsible for our thoughts and actions makes you realize that quite a lot is in your control when it comes to how you feel mentally. Are you consistently taking actions like reaching out to a therapist, being mindful, or playing sports that all contribute to good physical health? Probably not, but after acknowledging the importance of these things and choosing to do them, it takes taking responsibility to actually go out and do them. This also happens to build resilience since that is the ability to return to a place of mental stability. This obviously comes from building strong mental health but becomes a lot more achievable by being equipped to handle any situation thrown at you. It also requires a shift of mindset–understanding that you're responsible for making these changes and then continually doing so. Not every day is going to feel like a "self-improvement day," but every day should be such a day!

Embrace Imperfection

Self-compassion is so important for our mental wellness. It is about being kind to ourselves and our “flaws,” so we are not constantly projecting some version of our potentially perfect selves. This helps many of us to temper our body image—and generally lessens the pressures we feel to fit a mold or ideal. Imagine trading an expectation of perfection for an embrace of our full selves just as they and we are—leading to a different life and sense of what we can do (fear of failure goes right out the window!).

What about progress, not perfection? Yes, please. That sounds like a life far less filled with anxiety, fraught with the deeper meaning behind one mistake or five mistakes—talk about a great way to build resilience. Every step forward or backward is progress, which means something like my life is going to be okay, no matter what it looks, sounds, or feels like.

Watch Uplifting Movies

Movies that have a positive, funny context, such as "The Intouchables," "Groundhog Day," or "The Grand Budapest Hotel," can really help you feel better. It’s not about escapism, but about enjoying life—and these movies do an excellent job of reminding you that there’s a lot to find joy in. You wouldn't notice that there's something to laugh about in any of those movies unless you thought this narrative was funny. With this in mind, you'll be pleased to have a good time.

Laughter can reduce the tension [stress] that the body produces, and studies show that it strengthens your immune system by releasing endorphins. Upon release, they improve your mindset and heighten your mood so much that you can better handle problems that may seem like they'll kill you if they continue. Stress is one of the main causes of health problems that lead to a shitty death: obesity, heart disease, lack of sleep, highly critical [narrow] thinking.

Collect Positive Quotes

Collecting inspiring quotes can be a really powerful way to stay focused and motivated on our positive life goals! Choose the quotes that mean the most to you and that make you feel awesome. You might choose categories like perseverance, success, or self-love, depending on what your personal and professional goals are.

Write these great quotes down and put them everywhere! In your day planner, on post-it notes placed around your house and work cubicle space, or as alerts in your smartphone. Be creative about where to put them. Like I always say, physically writing things down and viewing them every day will help you remember them.

Nourish Your Body

A growing body of research points to diet as a viable treatment for certain mental health problems. Proper nutrition – having the necessary amount of omega-3s, vitamins, antioxidants, fruits, vegetables, you know, the usual – is associated with a reduced likelihood of being sad, anxious, and other negative moods and cognition. Foods high in nutrients might help to increase cognition and alertness, whereas those high in processed ingredients will increase anxiety and depression. It also makes sense that the foods that generally make you "healthy" also make you happy.

To get your fix of healthy food, stock up your fridge like you would for a general "weight loss" or "trying to be healthy" diet. Add more fruits and vegetables, potentially each one representing a different color of the rainbow. Add protein and foods high in healthy fats, like nuts, avocados, olive oil, and lean sources of protein like tofu. If applicable, meal prep to have these foods last longer throughout the week and be a ready-to-go option when needed.

Soak Up the Sun

Sunlight is a critical mood and mental health enhancer because it stimulates the body to produce serotonin, a chemical that helps transmit signals in the brain and has been linked to maintaining feelings of well-being and happiness. Natural light can also help relieve some of the symptoms of depression, such as Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), a type of depression that comes and goes with the seasons but usually shows up in the fall and goes away during the sunnier months of the year. The benefits can also be an energy level boost, a better night's sleep, and a good old-fashioned brighter outlook on life. You can increase your sun exposure by stepping outside and enjoying the beauty of the day around midday when the sun's rays are their strongest, especially from late morning to mid-afternoon. Stay active: Engage in outdoor activities such as walking, jogging, or anything that gets you moving around—and if you have a yard, do some gardening. If you live in a geographical location where the sun does not shine a great deal or there are long periods of snowfall, you can compensate by getting your "sunshine" in a lamp. Light therapy from these specially designed lamps is said to feel as if you're soaking up real sunshine, and these lights can also be a great way to treat SAD.

We’ve help identify different strategies to stop negative thoughts but you must first be aware of yourself and mindful in order to recognize intrusive, unwanted, and habitual negative thoughts. Awareness is always the first step in creating change. Then, you are able to challenge and reframe your cognitive thinking processes. Journaling, meditation, and repeating positive affirmations can help immensely.

It's important to know that overcoming negative thoughts doesn’t happen overnight. Like anything else, it takes steady practice and patience. Each small step you take towards this act of self-love will contribute to your better, more positive overall mental health. Great job for starting now and reading about how you can view the world—and yourself—in a better, more positive way. By learning about how to better yourself you provide trust in yourself.